Monday, 10 January 2011

Surrogacy - it's happening!

Suddenly I'm back to this blog again. I'm making myself type a post in order to make something which seems unreal into something real. For the last eighteen months my husband and I have been planning to do gestational surrogacy in the United States - and now it's happening. At the end of this week. Everything is sorted - finding the agency, the surrogate, the egg donor, the clinic, the lawyers. But the truth is that I never believed that any of this would actually happen. I just couldn't allow myself to believe. But now it is happening and I'm in a total panic. I realise that I have no idea what I'm meant to be saying or doing in this situation. I feel that I'm in totally uncharted terretory. Elton John has done this but not many other people in England have. I realise that I'm going to have to find some sources of support and I'm also realising that (as in the stillbirth world) the internet is more likely to be of help than those around me. In particular I just want to give our wonderful surrogate the best support I can. Very few people in my real world know what I'm doing. That's because I don't want to raise expectations but also because I just don't feel robust enough to deal with any criticism - although I now I need to get over that pretty quickly now.


niobe said...

Omigosh. Wow. If there's any way I can help or you ever want to chat or email or whatever, just let me know.

Thinking of you.

Tash said...

WOW! I'm so excited for you! Will be keeping you (and your surrogate) in my thoughts.

I hope you feel comfortable updating -- I'm nosy and want to know what's transpiring. Glad you're moving forward.

Anonymous said...

Alice, this is wonderful news. I'm sure you will find support in the online community. I have stoppeed by your blog regularly over the past 8 months and have been hoping you have been making progress down the surrogacy road during all the silence. Good luck... and remember, you are in our thoughts.

Karin said...

Wow! Fantastic! I'll check in often to see how you are going. I'm very excited for you.

I too haven't been blogging much. Just feeling unable to put into words what I'm thinking or doing. I miss it.

Thinking of you!!

Alice said...

Thanks so much for the comments! I'm in such a spin that I can't do anything much so I'm not writing things on this blog as much as I want. But the support is so welcome! Alice

Alice said...

Dear Niobe, Am so grateful for your offer of support. Can't get onto your blog for some reason now. I think I have other details for you so I'll try them. Would love to be in touch. Alice